As the next step in my quest to get back into writing, I’ve gone and entered the Wergle Flomp Free Poetry Contest, run annually by Winning Writers. This contest appealed to me for three reasons: it’s free to enter, it’s devoted entirely to humour poetry, and it has Wergle Flomp in the title! I’ve no idea how I’ll do; having read some of the past entries that placed or warranted an honourable mention, I fear my effort may not register on the judges’ radar, but nevertheless I’m quite pleased with this, and you never know…
I don’t think much of indicators; never use my lights.
Not interested in helping others tell my lefts from rights.
You think left? I go right then I tear out of sight –
gotta be on my way, man!
Courtesy was never my thing and I don’t do road laws.
In my flashy Rolls-Royce how I drive is my choice!
You think, “God, you’re insane!!”as I overtake that transit van,
no warning, just because I can…
“From a side lane he is heading your way to cause aggravation and tension.
Beware, any learners out driving today – he’s not heard of due care and attention!”
I don’t use my indicators when I’m on the road;
far more fun to merrily ignore the Highway Code!!
Look, I’m weaving again! You yell, “God, pick a lane!”
Cutting up that old Capri –
did you see her face back there? Hah, it was hysterical!
Could cause pile-ups with ease but do I care? Please!
You scream, “What’re you doing??” as you almost smash into a tree,
fooled by lights you couldn’t see…
“A road had to close for some hours today; our correspondent, Nikki, reports.
No fatalities we’re delighted to say, though the driver is quite out of sorts.”
© Catherine Smith
If you’ve read this far down, you’ve probably surmised by this point that I’m not a massive fan of drivers who don’t bother to indicate. Having said that, if all drivers indicated all the time, I probably wouldn’t have thought to write this… hrmm… tricksy…
All comments welcome!